Relationships are Like Condiments


Hello readers! Hope you all had an awesome week. I wanted to write something like this for a while. I think everyone can relate. Enjoy! 

So I saw this cute little  two-part video months ago. (It’s from one of my favorite, random cartoonists Don Hertzfeldt. Feel free to check out his other videos because they’re AMAZING!!) If I remember correctly, my ex boyfriend sent me a link to the video saying it reminded him of us. In a way it did. So go watch the clips and then I’ll talk!

*Waits patiently for you to watch the videos* Okay, did you watch? Good. Now we’re in business.

I love this short because it realistically addresses the awkwardness of dating for both men and women. When you go on a first date with a guy or girl, you usually don’t know much about him or her. You may have talked a few times or know of each other, but other than that, you’re usually going in blind. You don’t really know what to expect. You don’t know what kind of person he or she is nor do you know what kind of person he or she is expecting you to be. You want to meet or exceed expectations. You want to be impressed and impress him or her at the same time and it all can be a bit overwhelming. 

There’s small talk, awkward silences and maybe some mistakes made. You may say the wrong thing, look at them a little too long. You may want to go in for a kiss, but your date doesn’t respond. Or you could suffer through an awkward dinner and then OD on caffeine and end up in the hospital like Jim. I don’t know. It could and probably has happened.

Although Lily and Jim did have a romantic connection and felt chemistry, they both felt that they made bad impressions. Any guy (or girl) would feel embarrassed after having his (or her) face swell up and having to go to hospital. And any guy (or girl) would think that if their date really liked them, he or she would pick up the phone and call. But it never happens that way. Most girls figure that if their date doesn’t call within a certain time frame he (or she) wasn’t interested in her to begin with. It really sucks because if men and women made a second attempt at it, things would probably work out better. The second date might be terrible, but it may be great.

I think the problem is that most people feel that if you make a bad impression, their date will not want to go out with him or her again. They’re afraid of rejection. Things going wrong. Which is perfectly understandable. The unknown can be pretty scary. Most people don’t want to re experience embarrassment or pain, so they avoid it. It’s all just human nature.

Watching the videos again about three months after breaking up with my ex boyfriend (for the absolute FINAL time), made me think about my best dates. And of course my worst.

The WORST

You have to kiss A LOT of frogs before you meet your prince

I usually have good dates. But this one was AWFUL! It was my junior year of high school and I decided to make one of the troubled kids in my school my boyfriend. We had been going together a few days before we decided to go on a date. I picked the mall. (It’s close to home and at the time my friend was working there and I was cool with all the mall rats. Even then I believed in escape plans. Call it the paranoid freak in me.) We got to the mall and he wouldn’t go in ANY stores with me. Not JcPenny’s. Not Sears. Not Bath and Body Works.  Not even FYE. Oh, but he did go into Spencer’s Gifts with me. Shoot, if he was going to wait outside every time I went into a store, what was the point of him even being there!!!!! He was promptly dumped Monday during gym class.

(*In My Drake Voice*) The Best

I have two best dates. The first was my Sophomore year of high school. It was an anniversary/birthday date (since our birthdays were exactly 2 weeks apart. That’s cute right?). Well me and said boyfriend at the time chilled at his house then went to the movies (I forget which one). We ended the evening with a nice dinner at Chili’s. It wasn’t much. But it was really fun.

My second best date was with my ex boyfriend. We planned on going to an indie zoo (Bridgeton) in Jersey. (By indie I mean lesser known. ) We ended up getting lost, but we did find a place with animals, most of which we could have seen in my backyard. Because I still was in the mood to see animals, we tried to go to the Cape May zoo. Traffic was ridiculous on the parkway. I told him to just forget about the animals, so we continued on to our next destination, the movies. We went to see Toy Story 3. As we were waiting for the movie to start he ended up spilling soda on himself. I thought it was kinda-no really-funny. He wasn’t as amused. He was pretty embarrassed. But the movie was great. We may or may not have gotten something to eat after. I don’t remember. But all in all it was a really fun day.

Here are some other memorable dating moments from people on Facebook and Twitter.

@awardmethecrown on Twitter had this to say about his worst date “movies: chick made no attempt at a convo, texted the majority of the time, tlked during the movie n bout her ex the entire time.” This is what he had to say about his best date: “I guess by default this date at Carrabas was the best. It was cool, we had a good time there n then we chilled at her house.”

Tiffany C. on Facebook told me about some of the great dates her and husband went on while they dated. Here’s some of what she had to say. “my 2nd was a bbq at his uncles. we walked around the block and talked about everything and how we wanted to kiss each other (but we didn’t kiss) it was the day he 1st put his hand around me. he was catching lightning bugs and i named one bob. We went swimming and he blocked people from splashing me. the 3rd was his moms wedding, our 1st dance and our 1st kiss happened there, it was just an amazing night. our 4th was my padgent interview, we danced, kissed, and talked, and i wrote him a letter that made him cry happy tears.”

Sean D on Facebook recalled his worst date. “I had to help her babysit her drunk friend the whole night and I didn’t even get a hug or a kiss out of it or anything. She was kinda like, “Oh she has to go to bed k bai” “

Want to share your memorable dating experiences. Write me a comment. Thanks for reading! I know this post was really long, but I hope you enjoyed it!

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